Since the average life-span for a human is much longer now, is it possible to have a mid-life crisis in your early 30’s? If so, I believe I may be having one. I know that’s stupid and extremely personal to say, but really, I have some issues with my life right now. Don’t get me wrong or read to far into that statement, I love my wife and would do anything for my son. Our families, for the most part, are supportive of us and are there if we need anything. I have not one, but two good jobs for the moment and we are living comfortably.
Lately, though, it just seems as if I’m not happy enough with where my life is at this point in time. I’m 33-years-old and feel like I should have accomplished more in my time here, so far. Yes, I have a family support group, but most of my time is spent at work. When I am home, I’m tired and don’t really feel like going anywhere or doing anything. I certainly don’t want to be around anyone, as I enjoy peace and quiet too much.
I’m not really sure what my deal is, at the moment. I do know my second job, the part time Lowes position, is wearing on me. There are idiots everywhere, I understand, but there are some here that are really grating my nerves. The job is awesome, but the people … oh my goodness … Really? Can you come into a store, tell me: “There’s something wrong with my tomoatos, but I don’t know what it is. What do I need?” And expect me to give you something useful? I can sell you all kinds of crap, but I can’t guarantee it’s what you need if you don’t know.
My tempter is short. It’s always been short, but here lately, it’s shorter. Not saying dumping my second job would solve my problems, but it would be a start. As for the not being happy about where I am part. I don’t know. I have everything I want, and if I don’t, will save until I get it. But it’s just not enough. Having isn’t everything. There’s always that want and need. Maybe it’s my anxiety kicking back up. I’ve done pretty good with it over the past few years, but I don’t want to go back to our family doctor and tell him I haven’t been taking my medicine like I’m suppose to. I’ve gone nearly 2 years without using it and been great. But now I wonder if I need to hop back on the dope train to calm me down.
I just know that there is something missing. Something isn’t right in my world, and I can’t put my finger on it.
Anyways, one more problem I wanted to get off my chest. Seems I write the most when I have junk on my mind. More creative, for some reason.